Frankly, I'm dying to be back home. However, it would be very selfish of me. I'm not only going to affect CC, I'd be like a spoiled child too. Affecting her is a bigger problem for me now. Obviously she's going to be tired from work every single day, so I don't want to wear her out by being there, physically. Driving across the bridge everyday & spend the night with me after whole long day of work doesn't sound like a healthy plan though it's deadly romantic ♥
Easier solution that anyone would suggest might be asking me to just go home and her not having to come over everyday, right? Thing is, if it was me in her shoes, I would want to go anyway, no matter how tired I am. I know she would do that, but as much as I want that, I can't let her do that. She's going to be the first living zombie! :(
Of course, another part of me expects her to spend most of her time with me. So I fear. Fear that she might not be able to make it and there would be disappointments. I don't want to start blaming her for something I should be able to be considerate about.
Is it selfish to go back or rather, selfish if I don't? Being away from each other is killing us sometimes. Since I am the one who is away from home, I should go home and spend time with her whenever I can, right? But I really don't know, both sound equally selfish to me. Not to mention, after spring break, there will be another break, S-U-M-M-E-R !
What's a good solution to this question?
I'm dying to see her & I'm dying to spend every second with her! But given the circumstances, should I just forget about my 'undying love' that I'm really just dying to express to her up-close?
Every time I think about this, it messes up my mind & that, annoys me yet saddens me at the same time! On top of that, clock's ticking & seats need to be booked.
- That's all for tonight, one small yet sorta big complication -
( Sometimes I think I interpret things too much, but I can't help it. )
Oh! just one last question though,
Should work be more important than relationship at this point of your life?
24th September 2010
Friday, 2.57a.m. (GMT +9)
2 comments:
Go back on December and summer if I were you. I don't know. and why aren't you thinking that you're being selfish to your parents as well? She will have to disappoint you one of the days out of 3 weeks in Penang. It happens I guess? But you shouldn't too expect too much, it isn't easy for her is it? Plus, you can take turns and visit her instead.
Career shud be important, especially at a moment like this. But it depends on what one's belief :)
Okay, I was afraid that you'd ask me not to go back in December! :/ I thought of that too! That's why I was really struggling. Think I can take the disappointments, as long as it's not too many times :) So if it is selfish to do that to my parents, then should I still do it? I'm actually looking forward to the one in Spring :) Longest of the year!
I know it is important, but don't you think that jobs can be replaced but not love? Remember how hard it was for me to love someone? I got through it! :D
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